“The only thing you sometimes have control over is perspective.
You don’t have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it.” – Chris Pine
I believe most of us have encountered events; positive or negative ones from time to time. Some of the daily events; traffic conditions, weather, dealing with people, news, unexpected happenings, not getting the promotion and many other events that have happened before or may happen some time in the future… most of the events are not within our control.
What I have learnt from my mentors and coaches, the events or happenings may be perceived differently from people to people. Some may see it as negative, others may be glad and view them as positive. It is depending on the PERSPECTIVE on the person experiencing the event.
Jack Canfield (author of the Success Principles and series on Chicken Soup for the Soul) mentioned that Success Principle #1; “Take 100% Responsibility of your life” with the formula:
E + R = O (Event + Response = Outcome)
Whatever the Event may be, depending on the Outcome we want (positive or negative), we Respond accordingly (think and action). Please read the article as the link below to learn more about the formula:
“There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” – William Shakespeare
In this blog, I would like to share some pointers on how we can develop the habit of healthy perspective (inspired by Jeff Keller) in my own words, understanding and suggestions, please feel free to share your thoughts with me;
- The challenge(s) that you are experiencing versus your entire life journey. What will this matter 10 days / 10 months / 10 years from now? Of course the issue at the moment you are experiencing it may seemed enormous, just bear in mind that it is not the end of the world. It takes practice on awareness (mindfulness) and decision to NOT let the issue cloud your mind for the day(s).
- What is your end in mind? As this is the journey of your life, there are roadblocks and distractions along the way… focus on your mission and keep going. As one of my mentors said to me… “Don’t sweat the small stuff… look at the big picture!”
- As long as we can wake up in the morning, we should be HAPPY. The attitude of gratitude and not taking anything for granted is important. Decide to be glad and celebrate life.
- Have an open mind to events, adventures, experience, people around you and all the happenings have learning to teach us to be better. We have the power to reflect, observe and learn from the experience. What can we learn? How do we want to learn?
- Help others, pay it forward, do as much as we can (with any means necessary) without any expectations. Whenever we are able to give, it is a blessing and as long as we are able to serve and give… we should be counting our blessings that we are able to do that. Moreover, by focusing on others, we do not have time to think of negative events… giving ourselves to others will make us whole (sense of fulfillment) and happier.
- Birds of the same feather, flock together; choose your friends wisely. In this case, we have to be selective in choosing the right, positive and worthy friends. Whether we like it or not, people surrounding us will somehow influence us (no matter how strong your will power is). Better to be around people who are positive, spreading joy and happiness.
- Decide to view every events as an opportunity to learn, grow and be better. Of course by certain events, we may feel the pain… let’s put it this way, the reason we are feeling the pain, is because we are still alive (isn’t that something to be happy about?).
- Words and phrases have energy (positive or negative) effect on people. Be wise and choose the right words / phrases to use with people; not forgetting our own self-talk. Train your brain, make it a habit to talk more positives.
- Practice spiritual connection as people with strong spiritual beliefs tend to have healthier perspectives. Especially when we have strong beliefs and purpose, most of the time we are more resilient and focus on the big picture. We tend to be more grounded, having sense of confidence and knowing that things are in order.
- Leaders are the combination of the word “Learner” and “Reader”. Like what Zig Ziglar mentioned, motivation is like taking a shower, you have to do it everyday… How? one of the best ways, by reading. Hence we can earn more knowledge, skills and better perspectives.
- Exercise and move more. I strongly believe that we are built to move… get that body moving, heart pumping and release endorphins (neuro-chemical) that helps with making us feel good (fighting stress). When some of the people I met said to me… “I don’t have time to exercise…”, what I am hearing is that, exercise is not their priority! If it is very important to you, I am sure you can find time to exercise.
- Laughter is the best medicine… when you laugh, blood circulates better as your heart is pumping when you laugh. In India, there is an exercise known as the “laughter yoga”… you may find out more and do some research on this yoga to experiment it.
- Learning to say “NO” to activities that are not helping you to get nearer to your goals, mission or dreams. As we have limited time and time is a very precious commodity… we have to be selective to activities that provide us balance and getting us nearer to the results that we want.
“Each person does see the world in a different way. There is not a single, unifying, objective truth. We’re all limited by our perspective.”
– Siri Hustvedt