What you focus on…

“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.”
Aristotle Onassis

The title of this blog is left unfinished on purpose… how would you finish the phrase? As I have been in my new role for the past 3 months and frankly, the journey has not been easy… not the work, I do not have any issues with work… mainly people… who has the attitude of “holier than thou”, self-important and low self-esteem who is trampling on others to make themselves feel good… they may not think that they are doing so to others but it surely shows that many are somehow giving the feedback!

Anyway, how I would complete the phrase for this blog’s title will be… “What you focus on… you give power to…” as what my mentor-friend shared with me… the more I focus on the problem, the more the problem will be magnified.

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It is not easy to just brush the feelings aside when they keep finding fault with the team and I chose not to do the same as I find it a waste of time just wanting to fight back. Yes, I may be suffering in silence and to react will to make them having the fun of watching me losing it to their unnecessary actions. They may have the thought that I am just doing nothing and being weak… anyway, time will tell and I believe that I just have to focus on doing the right thing, then the results will be realised in time. May not be our time, it will be in HIS time.

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I know my time will come, I just have to be patient and keep going. I have been called to this role for a reason. Most people may not know it, I have my purpose. At the end of the day, people only care about themselves. So, I will take the higher road and building my strengths, then when the timing is right, reveal them to the world.

“Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you.” Ovid

“First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight you. Then you win.”Mahatma Gandhi

Anyhow, I believe that in the eyes of many people who care for me… I am a WINNER! Praise God for that.

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“Your habits, your future!”

Good Habits of Leaders

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Get up early

Majority of the top people in organisations (especially multi-nationals; and they are made known to the public), they wake up early… of course, there are some who prefers to do the opposite 😉

As what Anthony Robbins and other leadership gurus mentioned about having your own time… “the Golden Hour”, “Power Hour” or “Hour of Power”… the time for you to reflect, do your journaling, exercise, meditate, plan your day, strategise your project, do your prayers, read books, and your own important things to boost your motivation.

Of course there are some special people who prefer to do it late at night; anytime is fine as long as you get to utilise your own precious time to add value to yourself.

A lot of people that I have met, they shared with me that they do not have the time. My recommendation, just start with 5 minutes a day and work from there… increase to 10, then 15 minutes and so on… you will need to find time to do what you want to do and get the results.

“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” – Abraham Lincoln

Exercise Regularly

What do you have in mind when you hear the word “exercise”?

Walking, running, cycling, swimming, going to the gym, stretching, skipping, doing push-ups?

Yes, by exercising, we build and strengthen our muscles. Making ourselves fitter and stronger… having more energy throughout the day.

What I have realised, while we are working on our physical strength, we will also need to exercise our brains… the brain is a muscle, the more you use (exercise) it, the stronger it becomes.

How do we exercise our brains?

Reading helps, solving problems, taking on challenges, thinking about solutions, having discussions to share ideas, being curious, asking great questions, having open mind to learn, relax by playing Legos, some puzzles, games, sports… yes, our brains need the workout to be stretched and strengthen.

“Exercise is the key not only to physical health but to peace of mind.” – Nelson Mandela

Attitude of Learning

From the cradle to the grave, I believe that we are in a journey of learning. No matter how young or old you are, we are constantly learning. Whether we are doing well or facing failure (by the way, failure is a feedback – not the end… just a stumbling block experience that we can learn something from). As long as we have positive attitude to learn, we are growing to be a better individual; leader.

In this age of technology, we have access to multiple media to learn from, the YouTube, TED talk, Vimeo, social media – all the good, the bad, beautiful, ugly… everything that we can learn from; it is our choice to select what to learn. And of course, for those who prefer the books or audio books… they are also available.

The term role modelling; learning from a successful individual that we admire – we can learn by watching their interviews, talks, workshops, speeches, etc. In a way, they are like your virtual mentors or coaches (learn from their great questions). WOW! There are really a LOT to learn.

Another good place to learn will be the car; it is also known as “University on Wheels”; how much time do we spend driving everyday?

For instance, if it takes you 20 minutes one-way, you have a total of 40 minutes to listen and learn from self-improvement or any learning topics’ audio books… or you may choose any knowledge or skills that you would like to learn. Definitely a good choice for those who do not like to take the book to read; you can get your player to read to you and learn about the contents. SUPER AWESOME!

Positive Growth Mindset

“Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford

Life is a journey and I guarantee that, there is no perfect journey; like the weather, it changes and it is not fixed… and we are affected by the weather and how we go through the journey, depends on us… what mindset are we practicing?

We can choose to have negative, fixed mindset and feel miserable – having the weight of the world on our shoulders (that’s the price to pay for having negative thinking) or have a positive growth mindset…

What we can learn from Dr. Carol Dweck on Growth Mindset:

Growth Mindset vs. Fixed Mindset

Another learning that I captured from one of my mentors… the people that we constantly mix with will somehow influence us, “birds of the same feather, flock together.” Hence, it will be better for us to surround ourselves with people who are positive and having skills to complement us… not compete but complete us.

In my humble opinion, start our day with positives; having the attitude of gratitude (be thankful – so many things to be thankful for), read motivational quotes, stories, inspire ourselves… be alive. Or simply SMILE having positive thoughts. Imagine our mind like a garden, if you are the gardener, how are you going to tend to your precious garden? Are you going to leave your garden full of weeds or flowers? (weeds = negatives, flowers = positives). Your choice.

Talking about choices, I have a model (ABC-BCD) that I have learnt and would like to share with you (feel free to contact me, if you need more information).

 It starts with Awareness; perfect practicing mindfulness, then we decide on the habit / behaviour that we want to change and carry out the action. After some time doing the routine, it will be automatic (unconscious competence).

I believe that from birth to death (cradle to grave), we are constantly making choices and whether or not, we are willing to pay the price (for the choices that we have made)?

“Change Your Habits, Change Your World!”

#habitchange

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#worldofhabits

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